Positive strategies for dealing with change

Dear fellow bloggers and followers

Long ago when I was still living in Winnipeg I had taken a job re-entry program because I had been out of work for sometime. While I was there we were given quite a few handouts and this is one of them which I would like to share with you

Constructive strategies for dealing with change
1. Join or develop a support group.
2. Reduce making decisions for example can you postpone making an important decision especially during times of higher stress?.
3. Take small steps versus taking a giant leap.
4. Practice effective stress management techniques.
5. Try a new behaviour and give it time.
6. Practice an approach to health and self-care, good food, exercise, plenty of rest, recreation and good behaviour.
7. Seek professional help if and when you need it such as a lawyer, doctor, counsellor, accountant these are just some examples.
8. Learn to identify and overcome fears
Don’t fear failure, learn from it.
9. Accept reality and adjust your expectations.
10. Let go of the past, of what was.
I know this one is really hard to do as I held on to the past for 23 years and was finally able to let it go if you need help with this send me an email @Elaine.s@live.ca.
11. Try to affirm what was good in a situation and transfer that lesson or knowledge to a new situation.
12. Develop good communication skills.
13. Express your feelings about the change.
14. Vent or mourn you have that right.
15. Sharpen your interpersonal skills.
16. Adopt a problem solving approach to change although this may be hard to see at the time believe it or not every problem does have a solution, for me, I pray and leave it in the hands of god and ask for his wisdom and guidance.
17. Develop flexibility and be adaptable.
18. Have the desire to change, I always embrace change that’s how we grow as a person.
19. Get ready for change for example prepare yourself mentally, emotionally, physically and spiritually.
20. Examine possible ways to change and be sure to consider the consequences to those around you.
21. Be open-minded to the new and unknown. Cultivate curiosity.
22. Believe in yourself, have faith in yourself. Deepen your self-confidence with positive and self talk statements (sometimes this is a hard one for me to do).
23. Be optimistic and hopeful that can sometimes be hard to do.
24. Accept the change.
Change is inevitable and a part of life so embrace it.
25. Take care of yourself spiritually for example go to your sanctuary, breathe deeply, meditate, reflect, and/or pray.
26. Practice patience with yourself, be kind to yourself and remember that forming a new habit and changing an old one does take a minimum of three weeks.
27. Take initiative and be a learner try to learn something new each day, I do.
28. Get some perspective on the situation such as taking a break by distance or distracting yourself for a while in order to think about it more clearly and objectively.
29. Volunteer.
30. Dream and imagine.
31. Visualize yourself already having gone through the change and coming out successfully on the other side.
32. Dance.
33. Play sports.
34. Try cooking (this one really helps me when I’m stressed out and very upset).

Your quote for the day


Every experience we have is for a reason.
We can learn, grow and become stronger as a person.


Letting go

To let go does not mean to stop caring, it means I can’t do it for someone else.

To let go is not to cut myself off, it is the realization I can’t control another

To let go is not to enable, but to allow learning from natural consequences.

To let go is not to admit powerlessness,  which means the outcome is not in my hands.

To let go is not to try to blame or change another, it is to make the most of myself.

To let go is not to care for, but to care about.

To let go is not to fix, but to be supportive.

To let go is not to judge, but allow another to be a human being.

To let go is not to be in the middle of arranging all the outcomes, but to allow others to affect their own destinies.

To let go is not to be protective, it is to permit another to face reality.

To let go is not to deny, but to accept.

To let go is not to nag, sold or argue, but to instead search out my own shortcomings and to correct them.

To let go is not to criticize and regulate anybody, but to try to become what I dream I can be.

To let go is not to regret the past, but to grow and to live for the future.

To let go is to fear less and to love more.

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After a while

After a while you learn the subtle difference between holding a hand and chaining a soul.

And you learn that love doesn’t mean leaning and company doesn’t always mean security.

And you begin to learn that kisses aren’t contracts and presents aren’t promises.

You begin to accept defeats with your head up and your eyes ahead with the grace of a woman and the grief of a child.

You learn to build all your roads on today because tomorrow’s ground is too uncertain for plans and futures have a way of falling down in mid-flight.

After a while you learn that even sunshine burns if you get too much

So you plant your own garden and decorate your own soul instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers.

And you learn that you really can endure that you really are strong and you really do have worth and you learn with ever goodbye.

Many blessings have a great day


Women have strengths that amaze men.

They hear hardships and they carry burdens, but they hold happiness and joy.

They smile when they want to scream.

They sing when they want to cry.

They cry when they are happy and laugh when they are nervous.

They fight for what they believe in.

They stand up to injustice.

They don’t take no for an answer when they believe there is a better solution.

They go without so their family can have.

They go to the doctor with a frightened friend.

They love unconditionally.

They cry when their children excel and cheer when their friends get awards.

They are happy when they hear about a birth or a wedding.

Their hearts break when a friend dies.

They grieve at the loss of a family member yet they are strong when they think there is no strength left.

They know that a hug and kiss can heal a broken heart.
Women come in all shapes, sizes and colours

They’ll  drive, fly, walk, run or email you to show how much they care about you.

The heart of a woman is what makes the world keep turning.

They bring joy, love and hope.

They have the compassion and ideas.

They give moral support to their family and friends.

Women have vital things to say and everything to give.

However, if there is one flaw in women it is that they forget their own self worth.

So ladies from me to you be proud of who you are and what you do, stand up for your rights and if people do not accept you for who you are they are not worth associating with.

Many blessings to each and every one of you

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Twelve guidelines to live by

Hello to my fellow bloggers and followers:

I came across this when I was going through my papers just today and would like to share with you

  1. If you open it- close it.
  2. If you turn it on- turn it off.
  3. If you unlock it- lock it.
  4. If you move it- put it back.
  5. If it belongs to someone else and you want it- get permission.
  6. If you borrow it- return it.
  7. If you don’t know how to operate it- leave IT ALONE.
  8. If you use it- take care of it.
  9. If you break it- repair it.
  10. If you can’t fix it- call someone who can.
  11. If you mess it up- clean it up.
  12.  If it will brighten someone’s day- say it.

Another day

Hello my fellow bloggers and followers:

It has been a while since I have written an entry on my blog, many things have happened since my last writing.

Unfortunately I do not have easy access to a computer today this would be why my writings have become less, I have been very depressed lately and seems that since I have moved out of Colin’s and into my own apartment which I am happy about however, it has become very difficult to make ends meet, still not having a couch in my living room to sit on no area rug and barely making ends meet with my food supply and electric bill.

Since March 2013 when my physiotherapy began I have had to go on  public assistance which pays me $757.00/month my rent is $850.00 and unemployment was paying me $119.00 per week so you can see how much of a struggle this has become for me.

Due to the issues with past room-mates I refuse to move in with any others and Colin’s place (my former room-mate) that is not an option whatsoever due to hygiene issues and many other things. I will be looking into getting some form of a financial settlement from the city transit department due to their negligence earlier this year that put me in physiotherapy to begin with.

I will be writing in my blog again very soon with updates.

Take care my friends

Recent updates

Hello my fellow bloggers and followers:

It has been a while since I have written on my blog, I have been so busy and many things have happened to me in the past month or so not to mention my stress level has been on the uprise for the last week.

In January I don’t know if I told you about this but I was in an accident with a transit bus, I was also in the process of moving into my apartment at the end of January 2013 after having been in women’s shelter for approx one month it sure was nice to have my independence, live my life alone with my cats as I really do enjoy my company.

Two weeks into February 2013 we all had a surprise in our call centre, the general manager gave all of us without having any notice what so ever was closing down the call centre immediately, this was our last shift I have to tell you I was not in the least bit impressed so here I was just having moved into my apartment I’m beside myself so what do I do now?.

Other than being stressed out wondering what I am going to do, not knowing how I am going to pay rent, put food on the table, have a bus pass and I am unable to work due to this accident as I have physiotherapy three times per week for the last two months now, today I have had close to fourteen treatments of physiotherapy with no signs of physiotherapy ending anytime in the future and now that I am unable to work for an extended period and have had to apply for unemployment insurance which, turns out, will only be paying me $119 per week for fifteen weeks not to mention that social assistance will have to cover almost everything at this time.

I also forgot to mention that the owner of the building that I moved into in February 2013 well he plans to hike up the rent yet another $50.00 needless to say I am not very happy to say the least. I am  frustrated about many things it always seems to me that when I take a few steps ahead I get further behind.

The danger of neglect

When I was working at my previous job in the call centre we were all given this article to read I had found it interesting, when I had finished reading it I thought to myself this is true and thought I would share this with all of my fellow bloggers.

The things that are easy to do are also easy not to do.The primary reason many people are not doing as well as they could and should summed up in a single word. Neglect.

It is not the lack of money, banks are full of money, It is not the lack of opportunity, as we continue to offer the most unprecedented and abundant opportunities of any nation in the last six thousand years of recorded history. It is not the lack of books, libraries are full of books and they are free, It is not the schools, the classrooms are full of teachers we also have plenty of ministers, leaders, counsellors and advisors.

Everything we would ever need to become rich, powerful and sophisticated is within our reach. The major reason that so few take advantage of all that we have is, simply, neglect. The things that are easy to do are also easy not to do. That is how subtle failure is.
Failure is largely neglect. We fail to do small things that we should do, and this seemingly insignificant license carries over to those things that are important to do. Small neglects have a way of becoming major oversights with the passage of enough times.

Neglect is like an infection Left unchecked it will spread throughout our entire system of disciplines and eventually lead to a complete breakdown of a potentially joy filled and prosperous human life.

Not doing the things we know we should do causes us to feel guilty and guilt leads to erosion of self-confidence. As our self-confidence diminishes, so does the level of our activity. And as our activity diminishes, our results inevitably decline, And as our results suffer, our attitude begins the slow shift from positive to negative, our self-confidence diminishes even more. Failure to do the things that we could and should do results in a negative spiral which once started, is difficult to stop.

A continuation of last nights weblog

It is Monday and so emotionally drained very tired and stressed out because of what happened yesterday at my old apartment having the locks changed so I was not able to move my belongings out how convenient was that. As a result of this issue yesterday I will now have to get the police involved if this goes on for much longer this is something that I was hoping would not happen instead I was hoping to resolve this without any further issues but, yet again it seems that this is all about power and control and have to tell you I am sick and tired of this as well as these stupid mind games that people play. I will now have to take more time off to deal with all this nonsense of moving.
On the brighter side I will be getting my children back very soon and hopefully into a regular routine where I will be able to get to bed at a decent hour and get back to doing some reading before my bedtime getting a good nights rest and having a small breakfast in the morning before heading off to work.
I have plans in the very near future to get out and go to comedy clubs, out for dinners with a friend I have met here in shelter she is a woman from India her and I get along quite well and we are sharing the same room in shelter perhaps in the future we might travel together to Banff go sightseeing and stay a few days so I am truly looking forward to doing many things, meeting new people and making new friends all part of a new chapter in my life.

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