The danger of neglect


When I was working at my previous job in the call centre we were all given this article to read I had found it interesting, when I had finished reading it I thought to myself this is true and thought I would share this with all of my fellow bloggers.

The things that are easy to do are also easy not to do.The primary reason many people are not doing as well as they could and should summed up in a single word. Neglect.

It is not the lack of money, banks are full of money, It is not the lack of opportunity, as we continue to offer the most unprecedented and abundant opportunities of any nation in the last six thousand years of recorded history. It is not the lack of books, libraries are full of books and they are free, It is not the schools, the classrooms are full of teachers we also have plenty of ministers, leaders, counsellors and advisors.

Everything we would ever need to become rich, powerful and sophisticated is within our reach. The major reason that so few take advantage of all that we have is, simply, neglect. The things that are easy to do are also easy not to do. That is how subtle failure is.
Failure is largely neglect. We fail to do small things that we should do, and this seemingly insignificant license carries over to those things that are important to do. Small neglects have a way of becoming major oversights with the passage of enough times.

Neglect is like an infection Left unchecked it will spread throughout our entire system of disciplines and eventually lead to a complete breakdown of a potentially joy filled and prosperous human life.

Not doing the things we know we should do causes us to feel guilty and guilt leads to erosion of self-confidence. As our self-confidence diminishes, so does the level of our activity. And as our activity diminishes, our results inevitably decline, And as our results suffer, our attitude begins the slow shift from positive to negative, our self-confidence diminishes even more. Failure to do the things that we could and should do results in a negative spiral which once started, is difficult to stop.

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Be Inspired!


Every now and then it’s always nice when someone inspires you, it does not matter if it is Inspirational quotes or Inspirational affirmations  here are a few that I would like to share with you hope it helps  you to get through the day.

  • The only way with finding your limits  is by trying to go beyond them. Try doing the impossible today.
  • The first fall of snow is not only an event, it is a magical event, you go to bed  in one kind of world  and wake up to find yourself in another quite different. So, why not imagine that snow every morning before you pull back the curtain on your life?
  • Our biggest fear is what would happen if we dared to feel really alive, to risk being fully awake and inspired. What would happen if we really showed the world what we can do.
  • There is no end, there is no beginning. there is only the boundless promise  and inspiration of each new day.
  • My life is in my hands, I will let that thought inspire me to do something special today.
  • When the student is ready, the teacher appears-you might find your inspiring teacher in the most unusual place.
  • Archimedes said, “give me a balancing point, and I can move the world” well, that balancing point is here, now, today.
  • It is only by risking going too far that I can discover how far I can go.
  • Paint a rainbow in your mind and let that inner inspiration take you far beyond what you thought possible.
  • What would you do if you knew you could not fail?
  • The search for perfection will either make you or be your downfall.
  • Every day ask yourself am I making a simple thing complicated?
  • Open your ears, your mind and your heart. This is how you open your future.
  • Actions stimulates thought, so when you can’t think of any way to do it, start doing it anyway.
  • Your mind is bigger than you think, more powerful than you can imagine.
  • In the game of life will you be a spectator or a player?
  • What lies behind, and what lies ahead are insignificant compared to what lies within.
  • We might not have it all together, but together we have it all!
  • Doing what you love is where happiness lives.
  • The happiest people in the world are those who do what is right..
  • Look beneath the surface  and there is good in everyone. Today I am going to have  fun spotting the good in everyone I meet.
  • The highest reward of effort is not what you get from it, but what you become from it.
  • Happiness is not a goal, it is the by-product working for a goal and getting there.
  • There’s no point in wishing things were different, so I am going to tell myself that what I have is the best I could hope for, and make myself happy by making it happen anyway.
  • Happiness is a matter of getting what you need, so look at what you need; maybe you already have it.
  • Happiness is not absence of problems: happiness is learning to enjoy the problems.
  • Happiness consists of finding your unique talent and then using it to your greatest potential.
  • Looking for happiness and not finding it, is just the world telling you that you have lost touch with your own inner resources.
  • Have you done anything lately that’s worth remembering?
  • The way to unhappiness is to always want more than you will ever get.
  • Life isn’t about finding yourself, it’s about creating yourself.
  • True happiness comes from within, it doesn’t depend on what happens.
  • The best way to measure wealth is by counting the number of your friends.

We all have the courage don’t give up!


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Self Esteem Our core, the person that we are


Hello everyone:
 
Today, I wanted to touch on the subject of self-esteem because It Is so very Important as I have now come to realize.
 
Having been In abusive relationships and around people who have been abusive toward me  I finally realized they are no good for me and my self-esteem takes a beating,  no-one needs or deserves to be dealing with that nor should it ever be accepted.
 
When I had come to Winnipeg Manitoba after having been in numerous womens shelters I realized how important self-esteem was, when living at Alpha House for almost one year which is a second stage housing for battered women that have left abuse.
 
Living in Alpha House  has helped me realize that there are ways to Increase my self-esteem as well as decrease my self-esteem that I can really Identify with,  here are some of them:
 
To decrease self-esteem:
 
Compare ourself often with others, especially those that are more successful. There is nothing that I dislike more than to work for an employer and have competitions to see who is better at their job to me this is a perfect example of how to have someones high self-esteem drop down to having none.
 
To Increase a persons self-esteem:
 
We have to realize our own potential and accept the fact that there will always be people who are more successful In certain areas, I really do like this way of thinking we may be good at many things but others may be able to do It better and you know what that’s okay too!.
 
To decrease self-esteem:
 
Demand perfection of yourself and then only to reflect on your failures yup this one would definitely be me It has taken me forever It seems In order to not go Into beat myself up mode although at best I still sometimes do,  this one would definitely be a recipe for disaster as far as self-esteem goes so for all those that do this,  from my past experiences this will really kill your self-esteem hence feeling terrible It just doesn’t pay to demand perfection of yourself and reflect on failures.
 
To Increase self-esteem:
 
Accept that you and no one else Is perfect accept the fact that you will fail at things sometimes and guess what that’s okay too!
Okay I have to admit I have tried to be perfect and do things right the very first time but no matter what,  sometimes It just doesn’t happen look at all the challenges I have gone through such as many failed relationships, being angry so I have failed in some areas of my life and not afraid to admit It.
 
To decrease self-esteem:
 
Always say “If only”  and berate ourself for being stupid for not making the right choices we are our own worst enemies at best I know I am, this Is something that I have done to myself so often, I quit counting after one hundred I very rarely do this anymore however, I have to say It Is a learned behavior.
 
To Increase self-esteem:
 
Accept that I did the best I could then and just accept It for what It Is. Something positive and negative comes from the choices that we make, next time I will try harder.
To accept the best that I can do this used to be a real tough one for me as I would constantly say and think that I was stupid because things did not turn out the way I had wanted them to and/or making wrong choices which I have made more than my fair share of.
 
To decrease self-esteem:
 
Learn to read the minds of others and more specifically the negative thoughts that people may have about you. No matter how In tune we are with other people we for sure do not know how a person will react to a given situation nor know what they are thinking unless we are born with the ability to do such a thing which I do believe Is possible for some.
 
To Increase self-esteem:
 
Don’t assume what other people’s thoughts are, I really dislike the fact that people assume It really bugs me because most, If not all the time others are wrong and when It really comes down to It the only opinion that really has any Importance is of ourself and does not matter what others think of us.
 
To Decrease self-esteem:
 
Expect the worst and each time we fail telling ourself how right we were. Can we say self sabotage here I can not tell you how many endless times I have done this very thing I always thought It was a wise choice to expect the worst so that way I would not be disappointed.
 
To Increase self-esteem:
 
Expect to succeed and when you do give yourself a pat on the back as you deserve It,  this has been a very hard thing for me to do for many years due to my lack of self-esteem Issues.
 
To decrease self-esteem:
 
Talk often about how depressed you are okay seriously this was me and yes I still have my moments having been In a state of depression for years on end I have been on anti depressants as well which In the near future I do plan to stop as I feel that I no longer need them.
 
To Increase self-esteem:
 
Talk about the things that please you and make you happy, It seems that when being In a state of depression for me talking about things that pleased me or made me happy was simply out of the question I had lived from day-to-day but now I have plans for my future, I am happy and content, feeling at peace and much of that has to do with the fact memories are starting to come back and have closure on many things which I did not have before and writing about It.
 
To decrease self-esteem:
 
Be judgemental and use words like “should” “shouldnt” etc. We are our own worst critic I had been for many years always thinking that I added up to nothing, feeling worthless and useless and being In many not so good relationships did not help me any.
 
To Increase self-esteem:
 
If we use words like I will, not because I should but because I want to we should not judge ourself as sometimes things are not always necessarily black and white all the time.
 
To decrease self-esteem:
 
Be detached from life Instead of attached because that way you might get hurt If becoming Involved this was so me years and years ago I was just so sick and tired of being hurt and betrayed by others I gave up on associations with anyone and became very Isolated never going out, the hobbies I once had were no more among other things.
 
To Increase self-esteem:
 
Participate In life and relate to people as well as do things this was hard for me to do until 2008 when I went Into shelter I was always afraid of being hurt again and betrayed however now that I have become a better person and having the many counsellors helping me get that way no longer do I have all the toxic people who were In my life I have realized that I am worth something and can also give to society and help others and the place In which I live have finally started to associate with others that are good for me and can have a healthy relationship with.
 
 
 
 

Be positive and build your self-esteem


Well today I started to go through my binders about abuse hoping that It would trigger more memories for me and as It turns out I have more than what I bargained for the memories are coming from here there and everywhere can’t seem to keep up but In any event I am going to write what I can today beginning with more positive stuff that we did while I was In Alpha House.
On Tuesdays when we had women’s group we had an exercise to do I guess It was more on building self-esteem about ourselves, at first I had troubles thinking of positive things about myself but over the course of a few days and thinking extremely hard I realized there are some good things about myself some of which I wish to share with you here, the dots represent we had to add something :
 
 
I have a good sense of….humor
I have been told  that I have pretty….brown eyes
I like myself because…..I have the ability to make changes In my life
People often compliment me about….my cooking
I am most happy when….I work and help with animals
One of the many positive traits I have Is….determination
I look good when….I dress up and go somewhere nice or go for dinner
I consider myself a good….person with a big heart
I have a natural talent for….cooking and being around animals seems that animals are drawn to me
…God….loves me!
I like the way I feel about myself when I….have animals around me
I know that I will be successful In life because I will….be and continue to be determined
 
 
 
 
Another exercise that we were asked to do was Things I’m proud of now In our culture someone who brags Is seen as being self-centered and boring however, I do not  see It that way, In the context of healing from abuse, pride Is an appropriate affirmation of accomplishments, some of my accomplishments and things that I am proud of are as follows:
 
For having the courage to leave abuse and get help.
For keeping my sanity through all the abuse I have had to endure over the course of 25 years yes, I said 25 years.
Becoming Independent again and plan to stay that way for the rest of my life thanks.
Working through my Issues and finally being able to understand abuse, part of my healing Is doing this writing and hopefully to turn Into a book one day and being able to help others.
Putting myself first which I have never done Instead I always look after others first, Instead of myself well not anymore I am NUMBER ONE!!!
 
 
 
 

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